


these beautiful daydreams (chase all my nightmares away)

by MayBeBrilliant



Series: Birthdays of S.H.I.E.L.D. [4]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Adoption, Angst, Comforting, Dad Coulson, Daisy's hard past, Emotional, F/M, Gen, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Parents, Past Child Abuse, birthday fic, mama may
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:35:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28752264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MayBeBrilliant/pseuds/MayBeBrilliant
Summary: Daisy wakes up from a nightmare in the middle of the night. Luckily, May and Coulson are there to help her.And, you know, adopt her.
Relationships: Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson/Melinda May
Series: Birthdays of S.H.I.E.L.D. [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2040905
Comments: 4
Kudos: 66





	these beautiful daydreams (chase all my nightmares away)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Coal_burningbright](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coal_burningbright/gifts).



> my dearest twinnie! Rin, 
> 
> firstly, happy birthday to us! I can't believe how time has flown, honestly. dksdjksd, it shouldn't be the 16th yet, should it?!?!
> 
> i'm so lucky and happy to have u as an online twin, you're FREAKISHLY similar to me, super nice and hilarious and a really sensitive and thoughtful ear to listen to my rants. i love u so much, I hope u can do what u wanted to today. (I know it's unreasonable, but still.) 
> 
> as we said the other day before we were i n t e r r u p t e d, it seems like forever that ive known you, although its just been a few months. i was so awkward in the beginning, jfc. i think weve gotten to know each other a lot better, and i'm so thankful for that. (also dont worry i murdered the idiots :P) 
> 
> ENJOY THE FIC LOVE YOU
> 
> so many thanks to [Sanctuaria](https://aleksandrachaev.tumblr.com) for her beta-ing, without her this would be a lot less readable lmao.

* * *

The beds were too small, and hard. Not that she could complain, all the children at the orphanage lived in the same conditions. Grey rooms, grey, grubby towels, grey food. Grey rats, climbing on the beds at night. And no way to get out, the sisters checked up on you each day. It was more like a _prison_ than an orphanage.

It wasn’t that the sisters at the orphanage didn’t have money, she knew that. They didn’t have enough, maybe, but whatever meagre donations were left went straight to the head sister’s account, never to be seen by the children. They were left with barely enough food while the sisters had more than enough for themselves.

And the worst thing was, whenever somebody came over, they’d pretend everything was perfectly fine. The kids would be forced to plaster on fake smiles, acting happy and content as the sisters fawned over them. As soon as the people would leave, the sisters would go back to their usual sharp, scolding selves.

The only hope they had was of being adopted. And even that, occasionally, ended in tears. She thought back to her last foster home. It had been going so well, she’d gotten her own room and new clothes and good food to eat every day. The couple had a younger son, who’d become like her brother. But then she’d made the mistake, once, of calling her adopted father ‘dad’.

Oh, how he’d raged, saying that was unacceptable and that she needed to go back to the orphanage immediately. She’d cried and begged to stay, her nine-year-old self desperate for approval and love. He’d told her that she was a bad influence on his son, and that she had to get out. When she’d still refused to leave, he hit her, hard enough to _hurt_. She'd cried out, not able to keep it in.

Her adopted brother had screamed at his dad to stop, which had earned him a slap as well.

That had been what broke Daisy, she yelled, the tears streaming over the welt on her cheek. She couldn’t leave him here, he’d get hurt again! She’d begged him to run away with her, later that day.

When he'd refused, saying he needed to stay, she’d come to a decision. She’d tried to let herself into his life, and he’d pushed her out. If she tried that again, wouldn’t she just get pushed out again? It made more sense, to her, just to stay distanced and not let people anywhere near her heart.

So she packed her rucksack with the few possessions she owned, and ran away. Straight into the huge, terrifying world of the streets. It was cold out here, sleeping under a bridge every day.

And each morning, she needed to warm herself up, eat something, survive. It was so, so difficult. And yet, it was better than the orphanage. Sisters, slapping you if you did something wrong. Other kids, bullying you and stealing your food. And foster parents, hitting you, sending you back—

Daisy jolted awake, her heart pounding painfully. She was shivering, all tangled up in her bedsheets, tears mingling with sweat on her face. The room was shaking, the bed lamp dangerously close to falling off the table.

For a terrifying moment, she thought she was still back on the streets, having to fend for herself. Or worse, back with her biological parents, living a lie until they left her. Then she realised it had all been a dream. She sat back, trying to calm her trembling breaths and stop her powers from bringing the place down. The tears still came through, in an unstoppable flood, the dam of her memories broken.

At that moment May burst through the door, gun drawn, struggling to control the panic that had settled over her face like a tight mask. If you didn't know her, you wouldn't see it. She immediately saw Daisy, dropping the gun and running over to her, checking her over for any signs of injuries. "I heard a scream, and your powers were shaking the room. What's wrong?"

Daisy latched onto the familiar presence, trying to pull herself completely out of the nightmare. Her breathing was fast and ragged, but it calmed once May got there.

May sat down on the bed next to Daisy, tenderly brushing away the tears with her thumb. "Shhhhh," she soothed. "It's alright, it was just a nightmare." Pulling Daisy into her arms, she held on as Daisy fought to get out, pushing against the older woman's shoulders.

Daisy was still crying, choking out words through her tears. "But, you wouldn't- they sent me away, they didn't _want_ me! And, he hit me, I...You're going to— I’m dangerous, you can’t keep me here!"

May just held her tighter. She wasn't stupid; she could make out what Daisy was talking about. Fury rose slowly in her, not at Daisy, but at the unfairness with which she'd gone through her childhood. What right did they have to take a bright, kind-hearted child and turn her into a scared, defiant woman? Who still managed to be so genuinely _good_ ; it made her see red.

Daisy pulled back, eyes large and frightened, wet lashes fluttering against her cheeks. "You'll be just like them! You'll send me away, because I hurt people, and I can't control my powers, and you don't _want me_." This was said with such raw pain and longing in her voice, contrasting sharply with the resigned anger on her face. She turned away from May, drawing her knees up to her chest and huddling on the edge of her bed.

May stared, stricken. What had Daisy's childhood done to her? She'd been through a _lot_ , May knew, but she hadn't realised how badly it had affected Daisy. Her orphanage had obviously terrified her, her foster parents too, and it sickened her. She’d been abandoned into a world too cold for her huge heart, and it had weathered away at her trust until only a tiny fraction remained, buried deep inside her.

The worst thing was, _May hadn't known_. She felt guilt and self-loathing surge up in a wave, nearly drowning her in its fierceness. She'd sworn to protect this woman, her _daughter_ in everything but blood, but she hadn't even known what she was protecting her _from_.

She got up, moving over to the edge of the bed and sitting down next to Daisy. "I would _never_ abandon you."

Daisy faced her, anger and defiance and desperation in her expressive brown eyes. "That's what _they_ said. Right before they threw me out!" She brushed the tears away in frustration. "But I can survive; I’ve been doing it for years. I don't need your help."

May's heart broke for this strong, independent girl, the world breaking her down over and over again. "Daisy. I won't let that happen, _ever_ again. You hear me? _You are not alone_." She emphasised the last words, channeling all her emotion into them.

Something in her tone must have shocked Daisy into listening, because she tentatively faced May. "Do you mean it?"

"Of course I damn well mean it. If I could, I would kill the people who hurt you, I'd do it without thought. Do you understand? You're the closest thing I've ever had to a daughter; I'm not letting anything else happen to you."

Daisy's eyes widened. Her mouth fell open in an ' _o_ ' of surprise, May's statement seeming to freeze her where she sat.

May was starting to panic internally, though she hid it well. Why had she said that? It was _true_ , but Daisy had just lost her parents, right after finding them. Those wounds hadn't healed yet, and this was just rubbing salt onto them. Daisy would probably leave, get away from the tension hanging thick in the air.

But she didn't. Instead, she cast her eyes downward, murmuring almost too softly for May to hear, "Jiaying never felt like my mother, you did."

Relief, confusingly mixed with pity, filled May up. She was so grateful to be given the chance to help this amazing, strong woman, but simultaneously she wished Daisy had never gone through the foster system. Was it so selfish of her to wish that she'd found Daisy before she'd been forced to go through this world alone? "I am your mother, in whatever sense you want that to mean."

Daisy nodded uncertainly, as if she wasn't sure she was allowed to. "Mom," she said, trying out the new word on her tongue and finding its taste pleasant. The corners of her lips lifted in a tiny smile, starting to believe that she wasn't alone.

For the first time since she was eight, a weight seemed to lift off her shoulders. _She wasn't alone._ She had May. She turned, laying her head down on her _mother's_ lap, letting out a breath she'd been keeping in for almost two decades.

May's hand came down gently on the crown of her head, fingers combing through her hair. Daisy shut her eyes and leaned into the touch, starving for that motherly affection she'd been robbed of since she was born.

May sat with her daughter, a knot seeming to loosen in her stomach. Before Bahrain, she'd been a different person, able to laugh and grin and love. Somehow, sometimes, Daisy brought that person back out into the open, simply by smiling. So she didn't flinch when Daisy held out her hand, merely squeezed it and pressed a gentle kiss to her daughter’s forehead.

At that moment Coulson burst into the room, still in his suit, tie askew. Daisy shot upright, a small tremor running through the room in her shock.

"Phil?"

"Dad!"

"Is Daisy alright? Daisy, are you okay? Your powers—" he said, looking frantically around the room. Then upon hearing Daisy’s exclamation he stopped, looking at May and tilting his head. "You told her?"

All three of them looked around, completely confused.

Phil unfroze, walking over to Daisy and cupping her cheek in his hand. “Daisy...I wanted to tell you, but I’m so glad you know, and that you’re okay with it.”

She pulled back her head, frowning. “Uh, tell me about what? What’s going on here?” she asked, confused and scared at her outburst. What the hell had she been thinking?

May shook her head at Coulson. “I didn’t tell her, Phil.”

His eyes widened, and he withdrew his hand. “ _Oh_. Right. Well, uh. May?” He faltered, gesturing to his partner for help.

She rolled her eyes, but obliged. “We want to adopt you, Daisy.”

Daisy froze. (Somewhere in the back of her mind she thought tonight must hold some kind of record for her being shocked into silence the most.) The rest of her brain was occupied with thoughts mostly along the lines of _what the fuck?!_ May and Coulson, adopt _her_?

Somehow, with all those thoughts swirling around in her head, the first words she blurted out were, “You guys are _together_?

May slowly raised an eyebrow while Coulson stuttered. “I didn’t think that would be the first thing you thought about, but yes. We are.” She looked over at Coulson with an uncharacteristic affection in her gaze.

He smiled at her, but it dropped into a frown. “I thought we weren’t going to tell anyone?”

“Daisy’s not anyone,” Melinda countered.

Coulson couldn’t dispute that.

“Although this is great news, I want to hear about the...the other thing.” Daisy said, not able to get the words out properly. They were too strange, too alien, they had too much connotation.

Coulson and May exchanged a look, coming to a silent agreement. May spoke up softly. “We both feel that you’re our daughter, and we thought we could legalize it, with your permission.”

Coulson jumped in. “We know you’re not a child anymore, and that you don’t need us as parents. But if we did legally adopt you, there would be an inheritance and a place to stay, and—”

“Fuck that,” Daisy broke in, not letting him carry on. “That’s not what I’m worried about. Are you really—” She took a deep breath. “Would you really _want_ to adopt me?”

“Oh, Daisy.” Coulson let out a soft sigh. “Yes. With my entire being, yes. I want to adopt you more than anything else, because it means you won’t have to go through anything alone again.”

May nodded, this was exactly what she’d been trying to tell Daisy.

Daisy, for her part, flung herself into Coulson’s arms. She sniffed into his jacket, trying to hide the tears.

After a moment she reached for May, drawing her into the hug as well. They three agents stood there in a huddle, and not one of them was dry-eyed.

When Daisy finally pulled back, she laughed wetly. “So is that it? Am I your daughter now?”

“You’ve always been our daughter.” Coulson said, which made the two women smile. “But no, we need you to sign the adoption papers, if that’s alright with you.”

Daisy nodded, and he took her to his office, where he gently removed a document from a locked drawer. He unfolded it, indicating where Daisy should sign.

She held the pen gently, hesitating for just a moment. She looked up at May and Coulson, who nodded encouragingly. Then, slowly, almost reverentially, Daisy signed her name. She was now their daughter in the eyes of the law, as well as in spirit.

Not much would change, she mused. After all, she had been as close to their daughter as possible, even before signing the paper. She wouldn’t act any differently, and it wasn’t like they would, either. And she was starting to convince herself that they wouldn’t leave her, unlike all her previous parents. They were different, maybe because she wanted them to be, but maybe because they genuinely wanted the best for her and loved her.

Daisy knew which option she was going with, because deep down, she knew it was true.

She'd been fooling herself from the beginning, not daring to believe that Coulson and May could actually love her.

But they did.

She realised that now, and she knew that she loved them as well. Parents, she mused, hadn't worked out too well for her before. This time, it would, because all three of them were willing to put in effort.

It would work. Love, cheesy as it sounded, would win this time.


End file.
